How I hacked my life
- September 19, 2017
- Milica Radović
I have been living life for over three years as I wanted to. I have been traveling for three months and then working for three months. I am calm, refreshed, smiling and happy. Everyone asks me how I came to achieve my dreams. The answer is simple: I made a wish. There it is, the first hack:
1. I made a wish
A man who has no goal will not succeed even if his path is clear because he does not know where he is going. A man who has a goal and whose path is thorny will reach that goal because he knows where he is headed. When I was in Uruguay, I thought it would be nice to meet Pepe Muhika, a former Uruguayan president who is a living legend. My wish was so strong that it came true. (If you haven’t done it yet, be sure to read how magical it was.). So, make a wish and everything you do should be directed in the realization of those dreams.
2. I do not compare myself with others
When I was small and unawake, I compared myself to other people to give myself hope that I had time to succeed. “She did it at 29, he at 35 … I still have time.” Then I grew up and realized that everyone has a different life path. The biggest mistake you can make is to compare yourself to other people, however similar they may look to you. Bow to someone else’s success, help someone overcome failure. That is all. If you have made progress, just keep going. If you are declining, change something. It’s so simple.
3. I accepted my matter and developed my mind
I share the appearance of man on matter / body and the mind that body carries. These two things make up a unity that is complex and beautiful in every way. For some reason, society has set different criteria and values for that unity depending on where we lived. In Europe it is fashionable to be thin, while in Africa, bigger women are valued. Understand that everything is ok! You just need to tell to that something that’s okay, you give it a value. Overcome your physical flaws and work on mental gaps. I know it hurts to see how much of a gap there is in us, but that is the only way you can fill it by making it visible. Develop your mind because we know for sure that you will not carry matter with you when you die; we have no evidence for the mind yet.
I heard a wonderful thing from Tatiana Vojtehovski at TEDxZemun that remained a part of me: Let’s just call things real names. This has helped me a lot in getting to know myself. I started calling things by real names, however painful. When emotions or thoughts that are not good arise, I say to myself: You feel and think badly. And so I start to put light onto myself, piece by piece. Until I come to the point that I know who I am without pushing things under the rug.
4. I am trying new things
The mind expands by giving it additional content, not only in information but also in experience. Push your brain to be in situations where it feels uncomfortable, to be able to expand its field of activity. When you get used to the constant input of new experiences, it will become a daily routine. I learned to drive a tractor in rice fields in Thailand, make mud house in Uruguay, sew clothes on my mom’s sewing machine, cook meals from all over the world, make websites from scratch … to widen and refine the angle of action and ways of thinking in everyday life.
5. I think positively
No, this is not a worn out phrase, this is a true phrase. It has been mentioned so many times and so few times really used that it began to lose meaning. Learn to think positive and things will come to you on your own. Believe me, I tried, it works. If you are positive, people stick to you, tell you that you are radiant, and that they cannot say what makes you special, but there is something. Yes, that something is positive energy you send into your environment. Every day I meet people who have learned this hack and apply it. But I also meet people who have not realized the magic of positive thoughts and they do not believe this is possible. It is up to you to open the door to this approach to life. My friend Mirjana Gomilanovic almost told me: Some people have to see in order to believe, but the bottom line is that you believe in order to see. Try it, you will be surprised.
6. I write my-own rules
In order to be ok with your life and yourself, you need to write your systems of value and rules of conduct in your life. Do not be guided by the rules of the system that society has been writing and molding for years. Delete the values of society and make your own by which you will live. When you erase the values imposed by society, you will cease to seek the justification of society for your actions and your life will become more peaceful. You know best what makes you happy, not your environment. Society will automatically say: car, apartment, marriage, children, work… But what if that is not the case? It’s not with me. You have to live by your value systems. That is the key to complete happiness.
The most important judgment is the one you have about yourself. But don’t be fooled! I’m not talking about that judgment that comes from a pure ego. I’m talking about a judgment that comes from being honest with yourself. Learn to recognize what needs to be changed and what are your strengths. Once you know that, you don’t have to be interested in what others are saying, whether they tell you you’re crazy because you are chasing your dreams, telling you you’re eccentric, or something similar. People say different things to me every day, but it doesn’t stay with me. It honestly doesn’t touch me! I have my way and my goal. I take inputs from the environment and analyze them. If I see that someone was right, I obey. But it does not concern me on an emotional level but only on a factual one.
7. I live in a moment
I’ve said this again who knows how many times … You have to live now! You have no past, you do not know the future nor if you will have one. And what are we doing? We spend our entire lives wondering what happened in the past and how it affects the future. In all this drama, let’s forget that we live now, to look back at the people around us, the smells, the colors, the nature, the emotions. Life passes before us.
8. I don’t bond, I love
There is a difference between bonding and love. When you love, it’s for love, not for the selfish need to have something or someone beside you. Love should be a goal for itself – love for the sake of love, for the sake of that connection and enjoying it. When I learned this, I realized that I always had everything I needed. Everything was always there for me. The forms offered by the defects of the mind and body are temporary, and this connection which is realized in pure love remains for life. This hack is one of the keys because it is love that defines all relationships in this world. When you bond, you depend on that love and when you love, you are a free person.
Remember, you define your state of mind. Do not blame external factors if you are not happy or fulfilled. Throw family, kids, country, work, unhappy childhood and other excuses down the river and start hacking your life. Work on your mind, make it aware, change. I guarantee you will live better. The process of reaching the state of consciousness I was in now was long and painful and still ongoing, but it pays off. I am happy that I wish you too.